lens distortions — This is my term for the more common term, “cognitive distortions.” In the age of ubiquitous, digital photography, many people are familiar with the distortions that can be created by the lens on a camera or phone. Distorted perception caused by camera lenses or special effects are a metaphor for the way our thought patterns filter our perceptions of reality. Lens distortions, especially All-or-Nothing thinking is an important part of the 12 Skills video training course and the related worksheets.
losing it — A slang term for flooding with emotion to the point of being out control. See anger threshold.
love — Love is giving thoughtful attention and effort to the highest good of another. This is a definition of love that is robust enough to be found at the core of all the major types of love.
low and slow — During a conflict tempers often rise. One very effective way to modulate the rising stress and anger is to focus on voice control. Slowing down your speech and lowering the volume can help prevent a situation from spiraling out of control. But the content of a person’s speech must not be inflammatory for this technique to be effective.